


CT-Kark-You

by rho_nin



Series: Blinker Sang Adventures, AUs, and Lore Galore! [2]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, BAMF Clone Troopers (Star Wars), Clone Troopers as Brothers (Star Wars), Crack, Gen, Nonbinary Character, Order 66 (Star Wars), Order 66 Happened Differently (Star Wars), imagine that 20-30 percent of clones are trans or nonbinary, it's not relevant but imagine it, not like drugs like stupid silly fic ideas
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-08
Updated: 2021-01-08
Packaged: 2021-03-12 16:14:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 648
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28638336
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rho_nin/pseuds/rho_nin
Summary: Order 66 happens very differently, and Sang expresses her objections to the Chancellor.
Series: Blinker Sang Adventures, AUs, and Lore Galore! [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2096703
Comments: 5
Kudos: 130





	CT-Kark-You

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [The Chips Didn't Work](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25964908) by [Peppermint_Shamrock](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Peppermint_Shamrock/pseuds/Peppermint_Shamrock). 



> Hello! This is the OTHER version of what Order 66 looks like in terms of Blinker Sang, my very good friend who I made up. This is based off of a fic that I read that is the reason I started writing down any of my daydreams, so go read that if you like this!
> 
> Alternate title: In Which I Dick Around and Make References to Star Wars in a Star Wars Fic
> 
> The only canon character is Sheev, everyone else is someone I made up. Blinker, for clarity, is nonbinary and uses both she/her and they/them and I switched between the two with basically no rhyme or reason.

“General, you better get back up here,” Box said, his voice crackling over the comm. “Osik’s about to hit the fan.”

“On it,” Blinker replied, automatically, and they didn’t waste time trying to climb. If things were bad enough to be described as osik hitting the fan, they were bad enough to warrant Force-jumping up the side of a cliff. They landed at the top, a hand on their lightsaber, and surveyed the 304th. “What is it? What’s happening?”

Commander Box waved her over to a communcations terminal the troopers had set up when they arrived on Dallyth. “I just got the strangest comm,” he said. Box’s helmet was mostly decorated with geometric shapes, predominantly cubes. He took off the bucket and held it out to her. “Take off your robe and put my helmet on.”

Blinker did. She trusted Box implicitly; they’d been fighting together for ages, even before she’d been made a Knight and a General. He knew what he was doing. “What’s going on?”

“Seems Lord Sidious has decided he gets to play us like puppets,” Box replied. Blinker ignored that the simile was a little strange. “He commed me as well as every other commander and ordered us to execute the Jedi.”

Blinker went cold. They didn’t say anything, just examined what Box had said. He didn’t seem inclined to kill her now, but he’d said that he had been  _ ordered _ to by  _ Darth Sidious _ , of all karking people. Why was he putting his helmet on her? What was the point?

“We’re not going to do that,” Box added. Then he flicked the holo-projector on and there was a Sith Lord.

“Commander CC-6051,” said a voice Blinker knew well, “is the traitor dead?”

“Certainly, sir—I mean Lord,” Box said, in a voice that Blinker knew meant he was absolutely kriffing with whoever he was speaking to. “All people to whom the title ‘traitor’ could possibly be applied to are certainly dead.”

“And where is your helmet?”

“Knocked away in the fight, sir—Lord.”

The hooded figure of Chancellor Palpatine turned to look at Blinker, who was still frozen and trying to make sense of everything. Box wasn’t going to kill her, they were sure of that, and he seemed to be covering for her, but it was anyone’s guess what might happen next.

Blinker didn’t speak. Their voice would give them away.

“You. Trooper. Come closer so I may examine your armor.”

It didn’t seem like they had much of a choice. They crossed Box’s path and stood in front of the holo.

“You seem awfully short for a clone,” said the Chancellor, his voice low and dangerous.

“Something went wrong with the growth process,” Box interjected. “Nearly got decommissioned for it. But he makes up for it with grit.”

“I wasn’t notified,” the  _ karking Sith Chancellor _ said. He looked closer at Blinker. “What’s your designation?”

There was no way Box could answer this for them. If he did, Palpatine would know something was wrong. Mute clones got decommissioned. Blinker had seen it happen on the Kaminoan-run medical bases which should really be called something crueler.

Blinker took off the borrowed bucket and was almost giddy when the shock registered on the Sith lord’s horrible face. “CT-kark-you, sir. Blinker.”

_ “Why does this keep happening?!” _ roared the Chancellor, before ending the call.

Box and Blinker stood in silence for a moment, staring at where the Sith’s face had been projected.

It wasn’t until Drizzle moved out of the crowd and said to Blinker, “If you don’t mind, I’ll call you CT-kark-you from now on, General,” that the frigid apprehension broke and Blinker laughed, clapping a hand on Drizzle’s shoulder.

“I wouldn’t mind in the least!” they exclaimed, still laughing. It had been a long time since they’d laughed like this. “In fact, I’d like to see what Master Kenobi would do when he hears!”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading this niche content that I made! I am expecting no comments, questions, or interest at all, but if you DO have any of those, I would love to hear about it either in the comments or on my [Tumblr!](https://rho-nin.tumblr.com/)
> 
> Have a lovely day! Stay sane and stay safe!


End file.
